This just cracks me up...instructions for an umbrella?? Especially an AUTOMATIC OPEN-CLOSE UMBRELLA. Come on people...if you need guidance on how to open an umbrella, somewhere along the line...your life has gone drastically wrong. Do not pass GO, do not collect your $200, just check yourself into a special little place called Blissful Ignorance Institute and spend the rest of your days wondering why that commercial about "hunger pains/pangs" is so dang funny.
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